


Wanted Posters

by Ikasury



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Video Game)
Genre: Again, Being Dumb, Gen, Humor, Only a LITTLE bit gay..., Shoujo Filter, Team Aegis - Freeform, ambiguous timeline, comparisons, wanted posters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 12:17:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14934131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ikasury/pseuds/Ikasury
Summary: While traveling back through Torigoth, Nia notices there's been a change to the Wanted Posters...





	Wanted Posters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Summer_Dusk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Summer_Dusk/gifts).



> So Summer_Dusk showed me a picture of the new Wanted Posters in game and i didn't realize they ACTUALLY CHANGED! XD of course we could only come up with one reason why they were suddenly different~ hehe...
> 
> i figured i'd just throw this up on its own like 'How old are you?' because its just silly and not really romantic (even if the whole idea only really feeds Inquisitor Nyah! XD)
> 
> Enjoy!

Wanted Posters

\-----

The team was running around Torigoth trying to find the little kid that had stolen Roc’s core crystal.

“That little cats-paw!” Nia growled, stomping her foot, looking around, “When I get my hands on him I’ll-!!” raising her hands in a claw-like manner a vicious grin spread on her face. It was probably best the implication was left right there.

“My lady!” Dromarch shook his head, the big tiger clearly disapproving, “They are only a child!”

“Don’t matter, I’m gonna-huh!!” suddenly the Gormotti Driver paused, looking up at something above Dromarch, “Ey, what’s this?”

“Hm?” light blue eyes blinked as Dromarch looked behind him. There was the notice board at the entrance of Torigoth, “The notice board?” he blinked, staring at the fliers put up, “Wait-is that?!”

Nia seemed to warp next to the notice board, staring wide eyed at the posters up… then burst out laughing pointing at one of them, “Look what they did with Rex’s face! HAHAHAHA!!!”

The big white tiger just flatly stared at his Driver before turning up to see the posters, “Hmm, it seems to be a basic rendition…” his eyes moved to the right, noticing the other one, “Oh, it seems they’ve changed your poster…”

“Oi-what?!” Nia turned back quickly, clearly pissed and ready for a fight… only to stop and blink, “Ey?”

The new poster looked just like Nia, just a regular blank face similar to Rex’s and not the horrid monstrosity it was before.

A cream colored grey brow rose as Nia crossed her arms and stood back, “huh, not bad.”

Dromarch just rolled his eyes, sitting next to his Driver.

The rest of the team ran up to the two, stopping in their haste when they noticed Nia and Dromarch just standing there in front of the notice board.

“Hey, Nia?” Rex stopped ahead of the others, looking at the other Driver, “What you looking at?”

The Gormotti woman snickered, nodding with her chin, “Check it out, they changed the posters!”

“Huh?” Rex eyed her queerly, looking down to Dromarch who just shrugged, before in front of the two, “Oh, c’mon!” he waved his hands, “I got one too now?!”

“Least they got yours right the first time,” she snorted, rolling her head, “But hey, check it, got a better one of me, ey!” there was really no reason for her to look cheeky about it but it made her smile.

Rex looked close at the poster, “Hmm,” his eyes narrowed, “You sure this is you?”

“Meh-meh?” Tora bounced up to the two Drivers, “What hold up?”

“Sure it’s me?!” Nia jumped, ignoring the Nopon that came up between the two, glaring at the salvager boy, “You kidding right! This looks leagues better than that monstrosity it was before!!”

“I don’t see it,” Rex tilted his head, arms crossed, “Looks worse than before…”

“Meh-meh?” Tora looked between the two, then up at the posters they were looking at. His beady brown eyes narrowed, focusing on the paper renditions. He waved his hand back and forth, “Rex-Rex right, look nothing like Nia…”

The Gormotti woman glared, hissing at them both.

The boys yelped, both running to behind Pyra to escape Nia’s fierce hissing.

Red eyes blinked, Pyra looking between them all confused, “Rex? Tora?”

“You’re both idiots!” Nia growled, crossing her arms with a scowl and turning back to the posters. It definitely looked _better_ than the one before, she had a regular face at least. One of her ears twitched, “Hrm, wonder who did this?”

Thousands of peds away, sitting in her office back in Mor Ardain, the Special Inquisitor sneezed.

\-----

The team was making their way through Torigoth again, on their way to Leftheria…

Morag and Brighid had joined them… or really were just following them and helping out should anything happen. Their boat was docked in Torigoth’s port and would be there for a short while as it underwent some maintenance and it’d be back on the cloud sea and towards the odd little archipelago.

This meant they had time to kill while on Gormott. The Aegis team had gone off to do their own business while Morag and Brighid walked around calmly enjoying a light patrol.

They happened to pass by the town notice board near the exit towards the plains…

“Oh!” Morag stopped momentarily, looking over at the new posters. It was a typical habit of hers to check, at least cursorily, in case she ran into any of the people on the wanted posters or if there were any local events necessary to visit in the area. She walked over to the notice board to get a better look at the two large posters up, “I see the reissue has already been posted, excellent!”

Walking up behind her Driver, Brighid couldn’t help but notice the childlike smirk and how she practically skipped towards the board, “Lady Morag, is it wise to have these posters still in circulation?” the keen eyed Blade leaned in a bit forward, noticing as her Driver seemed to stiffen just slightly, “After all, if we’re now traveling with these two, wouldn’t that mean they’re no longer wanted by the Empire? Therefore these should be rescinded?” those blue brows were up and there was a slight smirk on the blue flame Blade’s lips.

Morag was not squirming, the Imperial Inquisitor did _NOT_ squirm, “Hmm,” she raised her hand, hiding a small cough and adamantly not looking in Brighid’s direction, “Probably…”

If anything, Brighid stared at her Driver harder, crossing her arms, “Lady Morag…”

Why was it suddenly so hot? Her collar felt oddly tight, “Its just a precaution…” Morag’s hands twitched so she put them behind her back, “In case… one never knows what might happen…”

Those seemingly closed eyes bore into her Driver, “Mmhmm…”

“It’s not like they’ll be bothered with us around!” Morag wasn’t snapping, she did not snap at her Blade and wasn’t making up excuses!

The blue flame Blade just gave her Driver another look before turning towards the posters again, noticing an ‘interesting’ little detail, “Why does the one for the Gormotti Driver state in fine print ‘If found, report to the Imperial Inquisitor’?”

Morag tried very hard not to twitch, “I-it must be a misprint…”

Brighid purposely leaned in closer, drawing attention to that odd ‘misprint’, “And it doesn’t appear to be on the one for the Aegis Driver… it even has your name, office and seal of the Inquisitor-!!”

“Brighid!” she did not raise her voice and she _did **not**_ squeak!

 The elegant blue flame Blade simply looked back at her Driver with a charming, _innocent_ smile.

“Ah, Lady Morag, Lady Brighid,” a large white tiger Blade trotted up to the two of them with a gentlemanly smile on his face, nodding to the two woman near the notice board, “Pleasant day for a walk, hm?”

When the two Ardainians turned to greet the beast type Blade, they noticed his Driver sitting on his back, arms crossed and eyeing them both narrowly.

Morag bit back her first response, needing a moment to compose herself thanks to Brighid’s taunting, grateful for the high collar of her jacket and metal visor of her hat.

Brighid on the other hand had no qualms addressing the two for the both of them, giving a small curtsey to the gentlemanly tiger’s short bow, “It is quite the pleasant day, wouldn’t you agree Lady Morag?”

Suddenly on the spot, Morag felt she shouldn’t feel as nervous as she was, “Y-yes, a very temperate weather, rather brisk…” she could just feel Nia’s gold eyes glaring at her.

“Oi,” Nia eyed them both suspiciously. Sure, they’d agreed to work with them, sure they’d come with them on the same boat here and were going to leave with them, but what the bloody hell were they doing looking so sketchy by the wanted posters?! Those gold eyes narrowed as her ears went back, “What are you two up to, ey?”

“Nothing suspicious, I assure you,” it was easier to react to an open attack than a subtle one, this Morag could deal with right now as she straightened up her stance, hands behind her back, parade rest perfect.

Those gold eyes narrowed on the Inquisitor, ear twitching, “Yea?” she crossed her arms, straightening up herself, trying to look bigger probably, “Why you lookin’ at them posters?”

Clearly she was more perceptive than she let on, the Imperial Inquisitor kept any reaction off her face, even if she could see Brighid giving her a sly look, “Just… noticing they had been updated and reissued…”

Gold eyes borrowed deeper as Nia moved her legs, directing Dromarch to get closer. The big white tiger Blade sat down next to the elegant blue flame Blade, both being a barrier between their temperamental Drivers.

Nia just looked at the posters, then side-eyed the Inquisitor, “Ey, you got anything to do with this?” it was just a simple question, a mere curiosity, nothing more…

Though the way Morag seemed to stiffen at the question was rather suspicious, “Why would you ask that?”

Those ears perked, her gold eyes turning flat instead of threatening, “Cause you’re one’a them high ranked officials in the Ardainian military, yea?”

Morag just stared ahead sternly, “That doesn’t mean I have anything to do with the wanted posters…”

Nia’s gaze got a bit sly, noticing a bit of color on the woman’s cheeks, “Ey? Then why you gettin’ all flustered?”

Light brown eyes just stared at the Gormotti woman flatly, “I am not flustered.”

Gold eyes rolled, “Yea, sure you’re not…” she took a moment to look the new poster over again, glad it wasn’t that travesty it was before, and for a moment, just a moment, softened her gaze and turned towards the Ardainian intent to _maybe_ thank her… if she had anything to do with this, is all, of course…

Only to spot her walking away rather quickly.

“OI!!” Nia sat up on Dromarch, ears up and puffed out, “I WAS TALKING TO YOU!!”

The Imperial Inquisitor simply waved her hand without turning around, “I have business elsewhere, I’ll catch up with your group shortly…” walking behind her Brighid gave a small bow, clearly making up for her Driver’s abrupt rudeness.

Baring her fangs, Nia just hissed at the woman’s retreating back.

\-----

They were on their way to Tantal, passing through Torigoth for… reasons…

Maybe everyone just wanted a bit of a distraction. Things weren’t exactly rushing at the moment and Zeke seemed to be a bit lost on the details of where _exactly_ his home country was, though that was probably just him stalling for time.

The Prince of Tantal was passing by the notice board towards the plains when something caught his eye… or really the _lack_ of something!

“Oh, hey!” the one eyed swordsman abruptly turned and made a beeline for the notice board, leaning over, holding his chin and overall scrutinizing the posters still hanging up there, “Hm…. Hmm… hmmmmm?”

The rest of the team stopped, watching as the big guy was confused about something.

“With the way he’s going on, you’d think he’d never seen a wanted poster before?” flat gold eyes were watching the idiot, Nia crossing her arms and leaning to the side quite casually.

“Indeed,” Morag, standing with her hands behind her back near the Gormotti Driver, just shook her head, “Perhaps he simply did not realize you were once a wanted criminal?”

A cream colored grey ear twitched as Nia snorted, rolling her eyes, “Ey now, weren’t you supposed to put in the good word to get those pulled down?”

The Inquisitor seemed to click her heels, straightening out her uniform while they were standing with nothing better to do, “I’ve told you, I’m not in charge of that. As far as I understand the warrants have been rescinded, but some places simply don’t bother removing the posters.”

Another snort, this time Nia crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, “Tch, sounds about right…”

Suddenly Zeke turned around, looking at Nia with a narrow eye holding his chin, “Hmmm…”

Gold eyes just flatly glared back, “What of it, shellhead?”

With a deep sigh, the Prince of Tantal just stands up straight, arms crossed and serious frown on his face, “These new posters just don’t hold the same charm the old ones did…”

“Oh my prince…” Pandoria pat his arm, ‘consoling’ him with as little effort as possible.

“OI! WHAT THE HELL?!” of course, Nia would overreact. Jumping while throwing her hands out in fists and a second away from hissing at the big idiot, “The old ones were horrid! So far wrong they’d have been useless!”

“They still managed to catch you with it…” Rex scratched his head, reminding those involved what really happened the first time they were in Torigoth.

Nia’s immediate response was to hiss at the boy.

“Nope!” Zeke waved his hand dismissively, shaking his head, “The old ones definitely had your countenance better…”

“How ‘bout I knock your teeth in!” the Gormotti Driver spun on her heel, hissing and now pointing at the prince of idiots.

“Weeeellll….” Fiddling around, Pandoria made a dramatic show of pulling something out of seemingly nowhere, “TA-DA!” suddenly she held up a copy of the old wanted posters for Nia when she was a member of Torna, “Hehe, why not compare?”

Everyone looked on in shock, none more so than Nia herself, “WHAT THE BLOODY HELL!?!” she jumped at Pandoria, only to trip and fall flat on her face when the sneaky electric Blade dodged her.

“Hehe,” pushing up her foggy glasses, Pandoria smirked, holding the poster out, “I knew keeping this would come in handy!”

The others looked at her weird, Pyra scratching the back of her head, “Should I ask why you kept that?”

Pandoria pushed up her glasses, “Oh, it’s nothing really, I just grabbed it off a notice board. My Prince thought it was a monster and I figured if we ever came across it we’d be able to take it out and collect the reward…”

The whole team just looked at her weird, but this was par for the course with Zeke and Pandoria.

Tora, Rex, Poppi and Dromarch gathered around the old poster, giving looks to the new one hung up several times.

“This more friend Nia,” Tora waved his ear-wing about.

“See, I’m not the only one that thinks so!” Rex pouted with his arms crossed, feeling vindicated.

“Poppi keep opinion to herself,” despite the dismissal, when Nia looked up to glare at the artificial Blade it was clear she was just going to agree with her Driver.

“I’m sorry my lady,” Dromarch sighed, waving his tail, “The old one does give a better impression-!!”

Suddenly Nia had popped up, eyes sharp and practically glowing as a menacing aura exuded from her body while she cracked her knuckles, “Finish that sentence, I dare you…”

Wisely the big white tiger just closed his mouth and looked away. The other three hide behind Pyra, who was shaking her head at the whole event.

“Lady Morag,” Brighid was idly propping her chin in one hand, “Don’t you have a copy of the original reprint?”

Suddenly on the spot, the Inquisitor nervously coughed, “W-well, I believe so…” she was purposely ignoring the glare Nia was sending her way, filling her time by finding where she kept the drawing. “Ah, here it is!” pulling out a folded piece of paper from an inner pocket, she opened it up and held it out.

It was another rendition of Nia alright, only finely detailed… with a few additives…

“Why are there sparkles?” holding his chin, Rex was scrutinizing this new picture. It was well done, sure, but what was with sparkles hovering around the background and overly dramatic lighting detail?

“Meh-meh?” Tora was scratching his head, confused by the picture, “Why this version of Nia have nice, sweet, shimmering eyes? Look very Blushy-Crushy, not menacing like normal?” he was not lying, the way the eyes were done made them look excessively cute… unlike the terrifying glare leveled their way right at the moment!

“Hmmm?” now Zeke was leaning over, observing and cataloguing every detail in the drawing. Once his scrutinizing was done he stood up, waving his hand, “Now that’s just complete rubbish, chum! Its like the artist had never met the fuzzy-ears before!”

Off to the side, Brighid had to put an elegantly gloved hand to her mouth, otherwise her snickering would be all too obvious. Only Dromarch seemed to notice, quirking a brow and his ears, giving her a look.

Light brown eyes glared murder at the Prince of Tantal, “I’ll have you know this rendition was done by a talented artist while she was in our custody,” a _small_ bit of color **_may_** have risen on the Inquisitor’s cheeks as she looked to the side, too irritated by Zeke at the moment to look at him. That was it! “It is standard procedure for such pictures be reduced to a simpler version in order to mass produce them for such purposes as criminal apprehension posters or notices to the general populace…”

The team looked at the Inquisitor flatly, looking back at the hanging poster then to the ‘Blushy-Crushy’ version in her hand…

No one was buying any of it.

Nia, on the other hand, seemed completely _oblivious_ to flat looks the Ardainian woman was receiving as she was looking the poster in her hand over herself, “Hmm…” gold eyes narrowed, Gormotti ears back as she took in every detail.

The others leaned in close behind her, curious how she’d react to this _clearly_ wrong rendition…

Morag was _maybe_ getting a bit nervous with Nia’s level of scrutiny. What if she didn’t like it? What if she tore it up?!

Suddenly a fanged grin spread on the Gormotti Driver’s face, “Hehehe,” that cat-who-ate-the-canary smirk spread across Nia’s face as she stood up, looking right Morag, “Well, gotta say, whoever did that one deserves some damn good praise! Might even give ‘em a kiss myself if I ever met them, yea!”

Red spread all over the Inquisitor’s face as she sputtered for a moment, reaching up with her free hand to pull down her visor and look away, “I-I’ll keep that in m-mind…”

Nia just smiled cheekily, gloating clearly.

The others were just staring flatly and shaking their heads.

Now that everything was over, Pyra just sighed, “I’m so glad they never did a wanted poster of me…” she ignored the whinging from Mythra in her mind, just rolling her eyes and blaming it on her other half being asleep the whole time.

“Man, that is just wrong,” Rex was scratching his head, still confused, “I mean, good they didn’t use that one, but the first one was fine…”

“You’re preaching to the choir, chum!” Zeke pat the boy on the shoulder, moving on with the rest and ignoring the two female Drivers, “Only those two seem to think there’s something wrong with it, can’t imagine why?”

The Aegis Driver just threw up his hands not getting it either, “Still think mine looks a bit flat…”

“Oh you should see mine!” the Prince of Tantal chuckled loudly, pulling out a poster from his coat, “Not as good as something the ol’ Zekenator could produce himself with his excellent skills! But it gets the job done!”

Rex just stared at the page in front of him. It had a crudely done rendition of Zeke, done in thick lines, most notably with his eye patch and holding the corner of his visible eye and sticking out his tongue. It was really as insulting as any of them came, with the fine print reading ‘Kill on sight’.

“W-well… that’s… a thing…” the young Salvager boy didn’t know what to say.

“Pretty cheeky, eh!” for whatever reason, Zeke seemed proud of it.

“Oh my prince…” Pandoria just held out her hands and shrugged.

\-----

Several years later, after the fall of the World Tree and Elysium being settled, Torigoth still remained and Nia and Morag were passing through after meeting up with Tora on some business.

One of Nia’s ears twitched as they were passing the old notice board near the exit of Torigoth towards the plains. Something caught her eye and she stopped completely, turning towards the old notice board, a scowl now spreading along her face…

“Nia?” raising a brow, the Ardainian woman paused, watching her companion walk over to the board and just rip one of the posters down.

“Of all the bloody things to survive!” Nia was growling, staring at the damn piece of paper, “WHY IS THIS STILL UP!!” turning abruptly, she held the wanted poster up to Morag, “I helped save the BLOODY WORLD!!” she flicked it, “No wonder people round here still giving me weird looks! They think I’m still a bloody criminal!”

With a funny chuckle, Morag just gave a minute shrug, “I’m s-sure it’s just a misunderstanding…”

Gold eyes flatly glared, before turning to the paper and _ACTUALLY_ reading it for once, “Wait-what?” bringing it closer she caught the fine print, “What’s this about ‘if found, report to the Imperial Inquisitor’?” gold eyes glared at the Ardainian woman, “Got something to say, _Morag?!_ ”

There may have been a cough, simply clearing her throat, it was quite dry out here, as the Inquisitor simply looked away, ignoring the heat on her cheeks, “It’s still valid…”

“By Azurda’s leathery backside ‘its still valid’!!” with a growl she balled up the stupid thing, “Of all the idiotic things to pull!” she tossed it at the notice board before turning, stomping away and grumbling, “How you gonna lose me NOW! That you need those stupid BLOODY posters still!!”

Despite herself, Morag just shrugged, holding up her hands and following the grumpy Gormotti woman, “its just in case, you never know…”

Nia just growled, stomping away, and still sour about those stupid wanted posters!!

 

 


End file.
